12 gauge shot glasses

Oh yeah! Addition to the things I don't need but love to spend money on.

Al Pacino in Scarface said, "I never fucked anybody over in my life didn't have it coming to them. You got that? All I have in this world is my balls and my word and I don't break them for no one."



Al Pacino in The Insider said, "I never left a source hang out to dry, ever! Abandoned! Not 'till right fucking now. When I came on this job I came with my word intact. I'm gonna leave with my word intact. Fuck the rules of the game! "



As you can see Al Pacino is trying to make a point.

You're integrity is all you're born with. What you do with it, in you're whole life is what people remember about you.

My mother will never forget the fact that I lied to her about not studying for an exam when I was 5. Does that make me a bad person, I hope not. Does that make me a liar, definitely not. That just makes me someone who lied really terribly when I was 5.

I had a Principal in school. Mr Roberts. He'd say, "The thing with lies is, they have very short legs. They run very very fast, but they get caught very soon."

My Dad says, "The thing with lies is. You need to keep stock of who you lied to about what. The thing with the truth is, it's just so much easier."

Now, I have lied before. But it was always for the right reasons, or selfishness or vanity. Why am I saying all this today? Am I confused about something? ells yes!

The Oracle in The Matrix Reloaded says, "No, you've already made the choice. Now you have to understand it."



What that means is I am trying to understand a part of myself. One that says my balls and word don't break for no one.

And while I'm at it, I'll solve world hunger and poverty and terrorism.

"If I just stay in bed, and pull the covers around me; if I just unplug the phone, if I don't answer the mail, then whatever bad news is waiting for me can't get to me. If I can just sleep, and then just sleep some more, then I won't have to deal with it. Not now. I can't deal with it now. Maybe it'll go away on its own. Maybe I'll die and I won't ever have to deal with it"

Call me fishmeal: On being crazy

"The most lonliest day in my life.
Such a lonely day.
Shouln't exist."
System Of A Down - Lonely Day

On the one hand we have:

"Freedom, urge, faith - and deeper he falls
Hatred, rage, fear - the stronger denial
Anger, heat, lust - the higher he climbs"

Satyricon - The rite of our cross.

And it is my right to my own cross.

"Life's no ordeal if you come to terms,
Reject the system dictating the norms

From dehumanization to arms production,
To hasten the nation towards its destruction
Power, power, the law of the land,
Those living for death will die by their own hand"

A perfect circle - Annhilation.

Let me be the man that you hate for always being right, on THIS day.

For what you might ask?

TO EXIST.

Really, I've had a cold for the past two months and it refuses to go away.

I realized today, people notice that I can't touch type very well.

And I realized more painful things today, I obviously will leave out. It's interesting how I always mention something sucks with absolutely no clue as to why or what. But always follow it up with something intelligent and funny.

Like this,

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender looks at the horse and says why the long face.

You wake up just before it. There's about five seconds of utter silence, seems like a lifetime. There's a noise, a grunt, a growl, a snore ... it doesn't matter. What matters is there's no one in the room but you, Nope, it doesn't matter.

What matters are the icy fingers clasping themselves around your heart, slowly squeezing every ounce of blood, sanity and life out of you ... breath by breath. Problem is you can't breathe slow, so you die inside yourself faster and faster.

And it's the same everytime.

But then there is the light.

"He makes us dine with him at his table,
Where the bones we eat are our own"
John Constantine

1. Take a flight back home at 5am and have the cabbie pick you up at 3:45, only to have him come an hour early and have a door that slides open while your asleep.

2. Eat a bag of nails.

Now I know the majority of you will pick number one, but trust me when I say this it feels just as bad as number two.

"Holy diver,
Sole survivor
You're the star of the masquerade"
Dio - Holy Diver

I have a problem with picking urinals.

Vison this; you walk into a bathroom at the airport and it's stark empty except for one guy. He's washing his hands at the washbasin closest to the row of urinals. How do you pick which one to go in?

Ideally, I would pick the one closest to me given that I'm lazy and whatnot. But geez man, like all horrid contemporary loos the bloody urinals don't have walls between them! So I can't go right next to the guy washing his hands there!

Okay, so you go extreme and pick the last one, but then again do you want to be that guy that walks across the whole loo just to go to the last urinal because he's shy? Do you?!

So you say, okay, compromise, pick the middle.

So you walk up to the middle urinal and decide no, not this one, too dirty. Check out the next, nope, not good enough, too much gum in there. Next, nope still not good enough.

And as such you just end up going to the frikin cubicled one.

I hate, hate, hate, hate urinals. They make you choose, and I don't want to.

"They shot, stabbed and bludgeoned nine people to death,
Committing one of the most heinous crimes in history"
Children Of The Grave - White Zombie version

1 archaic : blindfold
2 obsolete : hide
3: to deceive by false appearance : dupe
— hood·wink·er noun

There's a circle of people you usually trust. And by trust I mean, "This is a good movie, you ought to watch it." Anyone outside of that circle you regard with suspicion. Sounds simple enough doesn't it?
I don't like being hoodwinked. It's a mean thing to do.
I could be wrong though, shit, what do I know right?

I fly a lot.

Every single weekend, and I always fly economy ... company pays right ergo it's going to be cheap. Especially for a chindi player like me ;) Anyways point. So on an economy flight you know the rule of armrests right? It's unwritten I know, but I figured putting it up here might change something.

Here's what an armrest looks like:



I know it's a funky one but it'll do for this story.

So when you get on a plane you know you have to share the armrest with the guy next to you. Either you take the top half and leave the bottom half for the other guy (the horizontal line), or you share it half in half vertically (the vertical line). That's basic shit right.

Right?

This guy gets on the plane and wakes me up to get into his seat, which is okay I mean no harm, no foul I wasn't asleep yet. So I pull out my earphones and let this guy sit down but here's the kicker just as I get ready to sit down this guys taken up the whole armrest. The whole frikking thing!!

I'm thinking to myself, what the hell, he doesn't look to happy in life, let it go Sid. Just breathe, enjoy the Manowar playing in your head and chill out man, it's a 3 hour flight be zen, be buddhist and let it go.



So Mr. Smarty pants next to me starts flapping his arm right in my face. Twice, thrice ... the man has fits I swear!

So know I'm thinking to myself you know what, this guy really didn't seem like an asshole when he came in and what the fuck, I'm not doing to Daddy talk this guy into sharing the armrest, let's show this guy what a real asshole is like ... so if this guy is really on the fence he'll be a good airline traveller for the rest of his natural born life. If I'm wrong ... well that didn't come up.

I yawn, just as he's plugging his headphones in and wham I shove my elbow into the back of the armrest and into his ribs. Alright, not so much shove and gently nudge. Gently nudge is true.

Archimedes once said, "Give me a stick and a place to stand and I could move the Earth" ... I paraprhase but you get the picture.



The trick with sharing an armrest is if you're sharing horizontally and you have the back portion you're the King man. You're God. You're the dictator. You can nudge the other guy into how much ever space you need, hell how much ever you WANT!

I spent the next half hour nudging the shit out of the guy ... whilst pretending to be asleep listening to insane insane Manowar and enjoying every thorough moment of it. Twenty minutes later I leave this guy no space on the armrest and he's dying for space ... but nu-huh talk time is over I'm asleep listening to my music, being zen.

Meal time comes.

After the meal, I'm ready for him to rush and try to grab the power half of the armrest ... but this guy just folds his hands with a big prissy look on his face giving up.

I turn to him with a smile that says, "Everyone needs a motherfucker now and then" and say, "It's alright, you can have the armrest I'm going to sleep" I fold my hands and fall asleep content after a meal of uncooked chicken on a fake five star airline content with myself that I prevented one more asshole from being born.

"You know that everytime I try to go where I really want to be,
It's already where I am,
Because I'm already there"
SOAD - Sugar

Joel Spolsky writes about Idealists versus Pragmatists.

You should read it.

"They made a statue of us,
The tourists come and stare at us."
Regina Spektor - Us

Someone wakes you up and you wake up, but you're too goddamn tired so you just lie there hoping the guy poking you will just realize you're too tired to wake up and leave you there to your peaceful slumber.

He pokes you again, "Sid, wake up man."

You grunt, hoping your friend would understand and leave you alone without you having to castrate him for his transgressions.

He pokes you again, this time accompanying the poke with a shake obviously getting more agitated, "Sid, dude, wake up. We should leave."

You shake his arm away in disapproval.

He pokes you again, this time knowing he's going to get results.

You sit up and open your eyes. You have that feeling again. That knowing feeling that you dreamt something important, something worth holding onto. Something you're going to see six months down the line and go, "Woah! I've been here man". Something you're head is still clutching onto with all it's might, because this one seemed a little more important than the others. This one ... but when you open the palms of your mind ... emptiness.

Nothing.

Plain, nothing.

Living alone is like being married to yourself.

Now that could be a good or bad thing, could swing either way.

But if you're like me

You like clean, soft, ironed, nice smelling clothes. You tell your wife to use fabric softener and you understand so you use it.

If you like a cup of tea in the morning with an apple maybe. You tell your wife. So you go out the previous evening and you buy the stuff. You'd wake up an hour earlier and make that shit, because you understand.

If you like tucked in bedsheets before you go to bed, you take half an hour when you come back from work and tidy up, because, well as a wife, you'd understand.

Unfortunately the sex is not so good, at the end of a long hot day you're just tired ... and like I said. You'd understand.

Disgusting I know. But every now and then, I must convince myself that all this shit doesn't make me a woman, because it's the nooni that keeps me seperate innit.

Because he has a point ... always.

That because of this cruel awesome remember insignificant password tool by Giles Bowkett ... and the argument at the bottom.

"Kill 'em.
Kill 'em all"
Random Dimmu Borgir song I can't remember the name of.

Enter the ICHC online Poker Cats Contest!

"I am a vampire,
I am a vampire,
And I've lost my fangs"
Vampire - Juno OST

A fool is someone who makes a mistake, unknowingly.

An idiot is someone who keeps making that mistake knowingly.

A smart person is someone who learns from being a fool.

A dirty bastard is someone who makes that mistake because he understands the consequences of that mistake will confuse someone. Akshay is a dirty bastard.

I would name my general store Bhagvaan general store not Sejal.

Would you walk into such a store?

The Mumbai domestic airport waiting lounge has free wi-fi. No, I'm serious. It's labelled "Free Internet From Airtel" and it's super brilliant fast. Which is really convenient because you know, you're sitting there addicted to the internet and having nothing to do. It's frankly quite warming that Bharti is so thoughtful. Makes you wonder a little bit.

Picture a guy come in open up his laptop, scan for networks and then see "Free Internet From Airtel" open his browser, fire up Gmail and see a page that tells him he needs a username and password to use the internet, and that he can have one sent to his Airtel phone by just typing his Airtel number into a text box and hitting Send.

Which is so damned convenient, really it took exactly 20 seconds for the SMS to come through, and the username and password actually worked. Now that's convenient.

Unless of course you're not an Airtel consumer.

In which case you'll probably get so angry you won't want to use Airtel or see one of their super awesome emo advertisements.

Bharti is a 27 billion USD company and they can't give free internet to a waiting lounge 100 people strong. The whole point of advertising free stuff and giving yourself a better image is to invite people into you're circle of trust. Instead, what they've gone and done is alienate the 4 out of 5 people who're already outside they're circle of trust and literally give the ones' inside an egalitarian feeling, which is quite alright of course if you weren't already doing that with your hairbrained billing schemes that trap us in for life.

But yeah, it's alright to assume every 100 people out of a 100 waiting for an airplane to Chennai in Bombay at 21:30pm on a Sunday night must be Airtel
users. It would be blasphemous to assume otherwise.

"Sanitarium,
Just leave me alone."
Metallica - Sanitarium

"Everyone has a place in this world"

I think that's BS.

The thought of not fighting to be where I want to be makes my gut tighten. The thought of having to accept something I don't want to makes my throat clench.

I honestly believe when you wake up in the morning, you are your own snowflake.

So no, I don't think my life is not in my hands. In fact I'm sure it's in my hands, dead sure. So take someone and go somewhere. It sounds like fun.

So much so that I'm going to quote.

"Because I don't like the idea that I'm not in control of my life."
The Matrix - Neo

"Got shiny diamonds,
Like the eyes of a cat,
In the black and blue,
Something is coming for you"
Dio - Holy Diver