I seriously have the worst luck in the world!

(whole world's bad luck) / (no. of people in the world) = (cube root (my luck)) / (no. of people in the world who watch My Name Is Earl)

Hence,

my luck = (((whole world's bad luck) / (no. of people in this world)) * (no. of people who watch My Name Is Earl)) cubed

And since everyone in this world knows and watches My Name Is Earl.

my luck = (whole world's bad luck) cubed

Bad ass mathematics I know. I wanted to push some Contour Integration in there. But the formulae get by me.

"Metal Heart"
Dimmu Borgir - Metal Heart